Comedians Kate Berlant and Jacqueline Novak, known for their insightful and often humorous podcast Poog, recently embarked on an assignment for Condé Nast Traveler that took them to the iconic Golden Door, a renowned wellness retreat in Escondido, California. Berlant, fresh off the release of her HBO comedy special "Parmesan," and Novak, gearing up for her upcoming tour, found themselves immersed in an experience that exceeded their already high expectations, transforming their initial skepticism into profound appreciation. This article delves into their journey, exploring the retreat’s rich history, its unique approach to wellness, and the profound impact it had on these two cultural commentators.
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A Legacy of Serenity: The Golden Door’s Enduring Appeal
Founded in 1958 by Deborah Szekely, the Golden Door is a pioneer in the luxury wellness spa industry. For over six decades, it has offered a holistic approach to rejuvenation, blending physical activity, mindful practices, and restorative treatments within an exquisitely designed environment. The retreat’s philosophy centers on providing a sanctuary for guests to disconnect from the stresses of daily life and reconnect with themselves. This has long predated the current boom in wellness tourism, establishing the Golden Door as a benchmark for such experiences.
The retreat’s commitment to a comprehensive wellness journey is evident in its diverse offerings. Guests can engage in sunrise hikes through meticulously maintained Japanese gardens, participate in a variety of fitness classes from Taiko drumming to Ikebana, and indulge in daily spa treatments. The culinary experience is equally central, with a focus on fresh, locally sourced, and health-oriented cuisine. This dedication to a balanced lifestyle, aimed at both physical and mental well-being, has cemented the Golden Door’s reputation as a transformative destination.

Act I: The Genesis of an Assignment
The opportunity for Berlant and Novak to experience the Golden Door arose from their podcast, Poog, which frequently delves into the nuances of wellness, beauty, and luxury. Describing their podcast as "Goop backwards," they use it as a platform to dissect and analyze the cultural phenomena surrounding these industries, often with a humorous yet critical lens. Condé Nast Traveler, recognizing the unique perspective Berlant and Novak could bring, commissioned them to document their stay at the historic retreat.
For Berlant, the assignment offered a welcome respite after the intense period of filming her stand-up special. "I was eager for the week off," she shared. "Previously, I’d thought the Golden Door was a space I would perhaps only visit in the afterlife." Novak echoed this sentiment, describing their shared goal of "trying to get luxury items or spa experiences for free" as a core tenet of their podcast, making this assignment their most significant "get" yet.

The anticipation for the Golden Door was palpable, fueled by years of hearing testimonials. Berlant recalled hearing about it from a "gently famous, beautiful actress" who sought to "lean out after the excesses of the winter holiday." This positive feedback was further reinforced by a "downer-loving millionaire" who attended with their "brilliant and terrifyingly thin mother for her 70th birthday." These anecdotes painted a picture of a sanctuary dedicated to profound personal transformation, a concept that resonated deeply with the comedians.
Act II: The Ritual of Arrival
The arrival at the Golden Door is designed to be a deliberate transition, marking a departure from the outside world. Upon reaching the property, guests are escorted across a wooden bridge, leading to the retreat’s iconic gilded entrance. It is here, beneath a canopy of Camellia trees, that a significant ritual takes place. The bridge subtly shifts direction by fifteen degrees, a design element intended to disrupt negative energies and prevent their entry. Guests are encouraged to pause and reflect, consciously leaving behind anything they wish to shed.

This ceremonial entrance sets the tone for the immersive experience that awaits. Berlant and Novak noted the immediate sense of tranquility and intentionality that permeated the grounds. The retreat’s commitment to a distraction-free environment is reinforced by the request for guests to refrain from bringing jewelry, makeup, or perfume, as all necessary items, including clothing, are provided. This meticulous attention to detail extends to personalized dietary preferences and portion sizes, with options ranging from "small" to "tall plus."
The resort operates on a strict weekly schedule, with guests arriving and departing on Sundays. This structured rhythm, combined with the absence of personal items, fosters an environment of surrender and allows guests to fully immerse themselves in the Golden Door’s program. The initial intake process is thorough, with staff members engaging in detailed conversations to understand each guest’s needs and preferences, from allergies to desired class participation. This bespoke approach ensures that each guest’s experience is tailored to their individual wellness journey.

Act III: A Week of Unfolding and Discovery
The Golden Door’s daily schedule is a carefully curated blend of activities designed to nourish the body, mind, and spirit. Berlant and Novak found themselves participating in a wide array of offerings, from early morning hikes to creative workshops.
The Daily Rhythm: From Sunrise to Sunset
The day typically begins with a predawn hike, a practice Berlant found surprisingly invigorating. "Rolling out of the deliriously comfortable bed and into my provided hiking gear. Leaving in the dark and hiking as the sun came up. Thinking, this could be my new life!" she exclaimed. These hikes, often led through serene natural landscapes, offer a powerful opportunity for quiet contemplation and connection with nature. One morning, they experienced a silent hike that included sun salutations to the rising sun, followed by a labyrinth walk and a silent breakfast, a practice that emphasized mindfulness and introspection.

The communal meals are a central aspect of the Golden Door experience. While initially apprehensive about the prospect of shared dining, Berlant and Novak found themselves forming genuine connections with fellow guests. "We made friends," Berlant noted. This communal aspect, reminiscent of "summer camp for adults," fosters a unique sense of camaraderie. The presence of lifers, guests who return year after year, speaks to the profound and lasting impact of the retreat. These individuals, some with well over a hundred visits, credit the Golden Door with significantly improving their quality of life, underscoring its enduring efficacy.
Culinary Delights from the Earth
The cuisine at the Golden Door is a testament to its commitment to fresh, organic, and locally sourced ingredients. Chef Greg Frey Jr. and his team transform these ingredients into exquisite, health-conscious meals. Berlant and Novak were particularly impressed by the culinary offerings. "The food, we really must discuss," Novak stated. Berlant recalled her surprise at the swift and accommodating response to her dietary requests. "When I returned famished from a hike, and felt my breakfast tray wasn’t going to cut it, I requested more, and in under seven minutes sourdough pancakes arrived."

The Golden Door’s commitment to sustainability is deeply rooted in its expansive on-site farm, which provides a significant portion of the ingredients used in the kitchen. This farm-to-table approach not only ensures the freshness and quality of the food but also connects guests to the source of their nourishment. The culinary team’s ability to cater to individual preferences and dietary needs was a standout feature. Novak recounted how her request for a black bean tempeh ramen led to Berlant swiftly receiving a similar dish, highlighting the kitchen’s responsiveness. This level of personalized attention to culinary detail further enhances the overall guest experience.
Activities and Personal Growth
Beyond the physical and culinary aspects, the Golden Door offers a rich tapestry of activities designed to foster personal growth and self-discovery. Berlant and Novak embraced these opportunities, participating in everything from Japanese calligraphy and Ikebana to archery and water volleyball. Novak discovered her aura might be green, while Berlant was surprised to learn hers was yellow, a playful revelation that underscored the retreat’s focus on self-awareness.

One of the most profound experiences for Novak was a breathwork session involving singing bowls. During the guided breathing practice, she experienced intense physical sensations, including numbness and contortions of her hands, which the instructor attributed to a "big heart chakra opening." While Berlant, who opted for a less intense breathing pattern, was envious of Novak’s dramatic experience, both acknowledged the powerful, transformative potential of these practices. The retreat’s emphasis on mindful activities, coupled with its serene environment, creates fertile ground for guests to explore new facets of themselves.
Act IV: The Enduring Resonance
The Golden Door’s influence extends far beyond the duration of a guest’s stay. For Berlant and Novak, the experience was so profound that they extended their initial four-day visit, a testament to the retreat’s captivating allure. "To think I was worried I’d feel trapped after four nights," Berlant remarked. The prospect of leaving evoked a sense of somberness, leading them to request an extension, a move met with gracious accommodation by the staff.

The retreat’s ability to foster a sense of community and belonging is remarkable. Evenings were often spent engaging in activities like watching a magician perform, participating in a self-love ritual with flowers and affirmations, or enjoying an electric cello concert by the Koi pond. These shared experiences, coupled with the inherent luxury of the surroundings, create a unique environment for connection and reflection.
Act V: Re-entry and Reflection
The transition back to everyday life, known as "re-entry," is often a challenge after such an immersive experience. The daughter of a long-time guest shared her mother’s somber warning: "Re-entry is hard." This sentiment resonated with Berlant and Novak, who found themselves actively seeking ways to carry the Golden Door’s serenity into their lives.

Berlant, feeling more equipped to handle an upcoming emotionally stressful week, likened herself to Amy Jellicoe from the series Enlightened. She purchased Golden Door broth and a loaf of sourdough to maintain a tangible connection to the retreat. Novak, while not purchasing items, instituted a "post-meal gate walk" with her partner, mimicking the Golden Door’s evening ritual of walking to the gates and setting intentions.
The question of whether they would pay out of pocket to return is a significant one. A seven-night stay at the Golden Door costs approximately $13,000 per person, a substantial investment. However, both comedians indicated a strong desire to return. Berlant noted that the experience, while luxurious, is not ostentatious. "It still retains this feeling of old California health food culture," she observed. "It feels free from the overwhelming polluted space of optimization and wellness culture that is so soulless."

Novak suggested that the Golden Door is best suited for those who have already achieved a certain level of success and are seeking a deeper form of rejuvenation. "It’s the billionaire’s last stop, where he finally finds a place worth returning to," she posited, adding that it also offers an opportunity for others to "cosplay as one," experiencing a profound sense of peace and connection.
The Golden Door’s Enduring Legacy
The Golden Door’s enduring appeal lies in its unwavering commitment to a holistic and authentic wellness experience. Its rich history, coupled with its innovative approach to rejuvenation, has solidified its status as a premier destination for those seeking to transform their lives. For Kate Berlant and Jacqueline Novak, the assignment transcended a typical press trip, evolving into a deeply personal journey of discovery and appreciation. The retreat’s ability to foster genuine connection, provide exquisite nourishment, and offer profound personal growth ensures its continued relevance in the ever-evolving landscape of wellness. As they continue to share their insights on Poog, the echoes of their Golden Door experience will undoubtedly inspire listeners to consider the transformative power of stepping through that iconic gilded entrance.







